denial and Baby Tigger
Day: Tuesday
Time: 2020
Weather: Partly Cloudy, Windy
Music: T.a.T.u * All The Things She Said (Yeah, i know. an oldie)
Craving of the moment: Love Letters, the real one ;)
Pictures: Of your obnoxious blogger
i just figured something out. i had been keeping my thoughts and my pain inside, and had finally felt it erupt inside me, becoming big fat pathetic tears falling from my eyes. i don't have the slightest clue what had happened then, but yes, after 3 mths, i shed tears.
BUT!
it wasn't because of my messy break-up. NOPE. it has NOTHING to do with my ex or how i dealt with the situation. yet it has everything to do with me being alone and feeling in dire need of someone to hold me. just hold me and tell me i will find someone special one day. hold me and tell me that i can still enjoy my life until i find that someone - be it in 5 years time, or 10 years time (pray it won't be that long, omg) sure my mother tells me that i will find someone better, that she's glad i'm no longer hurting myself, constantly. but she also adds that i shouldn't find someone too fast in fear of any premature falling-out.
can't help but agree with her. lolz.
but well, there you go i guess. you can say that i've finally become vulnerable, insecure and somewhat in denial. but in denial because i thought i would walk out of the house feeling fine and dandy. yet in truth, i'm in denial because i thought i would never feel lonely... well, until at least before or after my birthday i hope *coughMAYcough* :D
but i'm not hoping too much. if it's not my time then it's not my time. but i do wish i'd find someone who'd treat me right. as impossible as it may sound, and i'm sure if i looked harder, looked beneath some algae-filled rock, or in some unknown cave, or on no-man's island, there'll be someone nice enough and right enough for me. :)
and to you my dearest Tassha, you know you'll always have my love and my unconditional support. i dont say much because i'm afraid of saying something that i regret saying, or you regret listening to. i want to help you and support you, but decisions are entirely yours to make. i've already told you some things that you can start doing, but it's your choice whether to take my precautions or not. i do not mind if you do not listen because girl, i've been through what you've been through. i've done the very same thing that you have done, and i've felt all the emotions that you have felt, too. believe me, i've had my share of horrifying downfalls.
you still have me to hug ;) you know that don't you? love you, babe. xoxo
*cough* OK OK! enough with the sappy speech and let's get back to some picture-admiring! :D
BUT!
it wasn't because of my messy break-up. NOPE. it has NOTHING to do with my ex or how i dealt with the situation. yet it has everything to do with me being alone and feeling in dire need of someone to hold me. just hold me and tell me i will find someone special one day. hold me and tell me that i can still enjoy my life until i find that someone - be it in 5 years time, or 10 years time (pray it won't be that long, omg) sure my mother tells me that i will find someone better, that she's glad i'm no longer hurting myself, constantly. but she also adds that i shouldn't find someone too fast in fear of any premature falling-out.
can't help but agree with her. lolz.
but well, there you go i guess. you can say that i've finally become vulnerable, insecure and somewhat in denial. but in denial because i thought i would walk out of the house feeling fine and dandy. yet in truth, i'm in denial because i thought i would never feel lonely... well, until at least before or after my birthday i hope *coughMAYcough* :D
but i'm not hoping too much. if it's not my time then it's not my time. but i do wish i'd find someone who'd treat me right. as impossible as it may sound, and i'm sure if i looked harder, looked beneath some algae-filled rock, or in some unknown cave, or on no-man's island, there'll be someone nice enough and right enough for me. :)
and to you my dearest Tassha, you know you'll always have my love and my unconditional support. i dont say much because i'm afraid of saying something that i regret saying, or you regret listening to. i want to help you and support you, but decisions are entirely yours to make. i've already told you some things that you can start doing, but it's your choice whether to take my precautions or not. i do not mind if you do not listen because girl, i've been through what you've been through. i've done the very same thing that you have done, and i've felt all the emotions that you have felt, too. believe me, i've had my share of horrifying downfalls.
you still have me to hug ;) you know that don't you? love you, babe. xoxo
*cough* OK OK! enough with the sappy speech and let's get back to some picture-admiring! :D
"Once upon a time, a cam-whore stumbles into a room...
She blew poisonous kisses to her admirers, hoping to find one who'd do her stupid laundry...
She even stuck out her tongue to entice any man who would feed her fat cat...
She feigns her innocence and tells everyone she's a mere traveler...
But she stops, finally finding the man she wanted...
Egads! It's Baby Tigger! Huzzah!"
Take care y'all! God bless :)
XOXO!
posted by Lana @ 14:18
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